鲁冰花 by 曾淑勤

我知道半夜的星星会唱歌
想家的夜晚它就这样和我一唱一和
我知道午后的清风会唱歌
童年的蝉声它总是跟风一唱一和
当手中握繁华心情却变得荒芜
才发现世上一切都会变卦
当青春剩下日记乌丝就要变成白发
不变的只有那首歌在心中来回的唱
天上的星星不说话地上的娃娃想妈妈
天上的眼睛眨呀眨妈妈的心呀鲁冰花
家乡的茶园开满花妈妈的心肝在天涯
夜夜想起妈妈的话闪闪的泪光鲁冰花
啊闪闪的泪光鲁冰花
天上的星星不说话地上的娃娃想妈妈
天上的眼睛眨呀眨妈妈的心呀鲁冰花
家乡的茶园开满花妈妈的心肝在天涯
夜夜想起妈妈的话闪闪的泪光鲁冰花
夜夜想起妈妈的话闪闪的泪光鲁冰花

东方女孩 by 蔡幸娟

寻遍山外山找遍水中水
谁是你梦中的女孩
走遍海内外巴黎到上海
谁能比东方的女孩
她的眉呀眉像双雁飞过长江水
她的眼呀眼好像西湖水含烟
她的唇呀唇像栖霞山上枫如醉
她的心呀心天山雪般晶莹莹
千万里的胸怀五千年的色彩
孕育了东方的女孩

(A song that I love, it describes how beautiful Oriental women can be. Very simple and short lyrics, yet it fully describes the features that makes an Oriental woman a beauty.)

Whoever Finds This, I Love You by Mac Davis

On the quiet street in the city
A little old man walked alone
Shuffling through the autumn afternoon
And the autumn leaves reminded him
Another summer's come and gone
He had long lonely nights ahead waiting for June

Then among the leaves near an orphan's home
A piece of paper caught his eyes
And he stooped to pick it up with trembling hands
As he read the childish writing
The old man began to cry
'Cause the words burned inside him like a brand

"Whoever finds this, I love you
Whoever finds this, I need you
I ain't even got no one to talk to
So, whoever finds this, I love you!"

Well, the old man's eyes searched the orphan's home
And came to rest upon a child
With her nose pressed up against the window pane
And the old man knew he'd found a friend at last
So he waved at her and smiled
And they both knew they'd spend the winter
Laughing at the rain

And they did spend the winter laughing at the rain
Talking through the fence
Exchanging little gifts they've made for each other
The old man would carve toys
And the little girl would draw pictures of beautiful ladies for him
And they laughed a lot

But then one day on the first of June
The little girl ran to the fence... the old man wasn't there
And, somehow she knew he was never coming back
So she went back to her little room
took a crayon, And wrote

"Whoever finds this, I love you
Whoever finds this, I need you
I ain't even got no one to talk to
So, whoever finds this, I love you!

(An old song that I like. I almost cried when I first heard this song. Very sad lyrics. I prefer the one by Qi Yu, though.)

Giving way to ambulances

You come across an ambulance on the road every once in a while. Yet in Singapore, people don't really get out of the way until the ambulance is right behind them.

When I was in Hawaii, we came across two ambulances (on separate occasions) while on the road. The moment people noticed the ambulance in the distant, cars pulled over to make way (in the midst of a traffic jam), allowing the ambulance an easy path through the crowded street. I guess we still have some way to go before we can call ourselves a gracious society.

Love to swim

We know that the baby loves to swim since the first time we brought him to the pool.
He is also easier to carry in the water, which makes it easy for us parents. :)
We even tried sliding down the waterslide together. First time for me on the waterslide as well, I was a bit apprehensive at first (since it is meant for kids) but for the sake of the baby, I went down with him.
And after swimming in the pool, what better way to dry off, than to use the special bathing towel sewn together by the wife? She even put a ladybug design on it.

Learning to stand

The baby's been trying to learn to stand. Here he is, using his bumbo chair to stand.
And here he is, using his gym to stand.
Caught in the act!
Soon he will be walking, but for now, he still needs his walker to get around quickly.

The Land of Rainbows

I recently went to the land of rainbows, Hawaii (Oahu, to be exact) for a working trip. So here are some pictures (not a lot, since I didn't get to sightsee much).

Rainbows greeted us everywhere. Here's a picture of one.
From my hotel room, I had a good view of Honolulu, and here is the sunrise at Honolulu.
Waikiki Beach is just nearby (within walking distance if you want). It was December, so there weren't as many people on the beach as in summer.
And here's the sun setting over Waikiki Beach.

Visit to goat farm

The wife hasn't been updating her blog of late, so I thought I would help out a bit so that pictures of the baby (he's a toddler now) get uploaded to cyberspace in good time.

We visited a goat farm in Singapore a few weeks back. It was a good break from city life to drive into the countryside (whatever remains of the countryside in Singapore). The farm visit was very short, though, since we are not allowed to come into contact with the goats anymore (hygiene reasons and so on). So we did a round of the farm, saw the goats, and then went off to see fishes (koi, to be exact).
Here's the baby focused on looking at the goats.

Solid food

The baby has been taking solid food for a while now. Here's a picture of him in his bumbo chair (which he thinks is his personal toilet...) enjoying his brunch (looks like a mix of porridge, pumpkin and baby paste food).

Merry Christmas

Wishing all a Merry Christmas!

Fedora 12 on a portable hard disk

I have managed to install Fedora 12 on my new portable hard disk. It was actually quite easy, since the installation DVD was able to detect my portable hard disk (connected via USB) during the installation process, and all I had to do was select it as the target for installation, shrink the existing partition on it (from 500Gb to 400Gb, using the remaining 100Gb for Fedora). Then install Fedora on the newly created partition.

Getting the latest Nvidia drivers, though, was tricky. But following the directions here, I was able to get things to work. However, I took out the line "vga=0x318" from the line to add to "etc/grub.conf", since it caused my display resolution to drop.

The only thing I haven't been able to get to work is "tvtime", it has picture but no sound. Plus it doesn't record shows. Guess I will have to be on the lookout on how to solve this...

Spending Christmas

Christmas is just round the corner (tomorrow). A recent newspaper report says that more singles start to date in December. I guess it is true that no one likes to spend Christmas on their own. That would explain the rise in dating, so that singles then have someone to spend Christmas with (assuming things work out well). Of course, since single men usually date single women, and with both parties being singles hating to spend Christmas on their own, I guess they will both hang in there until after Christmas.

Be on the lookout for the post-Christmas breakups!

Avatar (2009 film)

Watched Avatar today. And just cannot help it but link it with another movie (or rather, animation), Princess Mononoke. Both movies have a similar theme, in which humans are taking resources from the earth, while another group of non-humans (humanoids in Avatar, animal spirits in Princess Mononoke) are trying to stop them so as to return the balance of nature.

I must admit that the special effects (computer graphics) were very well done. If games nowadays are anywhere near what I saw on the screen, things would be breathtaking. But I guess I will need a few powerful graphics card as well to be able to render such graphics...

One thing that came into my mind while watching the movie. Gaming addiction. An avatar in the computer sense is a representative of a user in an online community. When in the movie, Jake kept going back to his avatar world, skipping meals or wolfing them down, missing baths, etc. it was kind of like a computer game addict hooked to his game, spending every moment he could to spend time online (as his avatar), neglecting meals and other inconveniences of life.

I guess the message from the movie is twofold. First, we need to treasure our environment, respect nature and not just take it for granted. Secondly, you need to draw a line between your online avatar and your real self, and not let yourself grow addicted to an alter ego such that eventually, the alter ego takes over the real self.

But let's not think too much about this movie. This movie is great to watch just for the graphics.

Survivor: Samoa

Natalie White showed us something. That sometimes, being a survivor doesn't mean being mean and fierce and fighting all the way. She won Survivor: Samoa not because she was able to win all the challenges or strategise who to vote out next. She won because she had good sense (she knew how to avoid drawing attention to herself and avoid being a target),and a good strategy (she led people into thinking she is not a threat). She outwit, outlast and outplayed the rest. The most hardball player, Russell Hantz, never realised she was a threat and that she was using him as her ticket to the finale, until it was too late.

Totto-chan: The Little Girl at the Window

This book ("窓ぎわのトットちゃん" in Japanese) is written by Kuroyanagi Tetsuko, about herself. This book is about her childhood ("Totto-chan" is her nickname) during a very specific period of time when she was in elementary school. She was in a school known as "Tomoe Gakuen" founded by Kobayashi Sosaku.

I first came to know this book in secondary school, when it was used as a textbook for literature class. I really enjoyed the story, which was about how the author spent her days at Tomoe Gakuen, and the lessons that she learnt there from the headmaster Mr Kobayashi. Those lessons probably played a part in her upbringing and influenced her childhood development.

Totto-chan has since grown up and gone on to become a UNICEF Goodwill Ambassador and also hosts her own talk show on Japanese television. This book was a huge success in Japan and probably worldwide as well. Ask any Japanese if they know Totto-chan and they will all say yes.

I have read the book a few times, including once in the original Japanese text. I would say Dorothy Britton did an excellent job translating the original Japanese text into English, for nothing is lost in translation. The feelings conveyed is the same. Mr Kobayashi is a great educator with foresight and his views on education should not be brushed aside.

If you have children, this is a good book to read, to understand how you can help bring out the best in your children, rather than pile stress on them forcing them to study for school.

Update 18 December 2023: The book received a Guiness World Record for being the most published autobiography penned by a single author.

TV personality Kuroyanagi's "Totto-chan" memoir earns Guinness record

New tactic spotted

Imagine this. You are walking on the street when out of the blue, a young lady walks up to you and greets you. She then sticks out her hand. What do you do?

I guess the naturally reaction is to shake her hand. Once you do that, she holds on to your hand, and starts to introduce herself as being from so and so organisation, and talking to you about a product that her company has, and so on. All the while, she holds on to your hand even though you are trying to pull your hand away. But you can't pull too hard, she is a lady after all.

Great sales tactic. Spotted today on the street (no, I wasn't the lucky one.) So watch out guys. Friendly ladies on the streets may not be what they appear to be.

First words... Not!

I woke up this morning, only to hear the baby making noises. All of a sudden, I heard him say, "Hi Daddy" (actually, it was more of like "hai dah dee"). But I know he wasn't saying "hi daddy" because:

1. English is unlikely to be his mother tongue, not with the amount of Japanese being used at home.
2. Even when I use English at home with the baby, I use "hello", not "hi".
3. I don't refer myself to him as "daddy", and neither does my wife.
4. 9-month old babies don't talk.

What does all these say? Well, it goes to show that what they say about putting a monkey with a typewriter can possibly be true, that a monkey typing randomly on a typewriter may eventually make a string of characters that is actually a proper sentence.

Me? I am happy just as long as he doesn't cry.

Pearl Harbor 68th anniversary

Last year, I posted a note on the 67th anniversary of the Pearl Harbor attack.

This year, I was able to visit Pearl Harbor just before the anniversary (7 Dec Hawaiian time, 8 Dec Japanese time). You can see the air traffic control tower at Ford Island, preserved as a monument from the attack. Ford Island is still being used by the US military, though the immediate area around the tower is now a museum (Pacific Aviation Museum) showcasing World War 2.

Autumn rain, winter snow

Autumn rain, winter snow,
Yet in cold the rivers flow.
Falling leaves, empty branches,
Running around, the squirrel searches.

(Written on 3 Dec 1998.)

House of Seafood @ 180

A friend of my wife is in town, so we went for dinner at "House of Seafood @ 180" for some black pepper crabs. It is one of the seafood restaurants that we frequent.

I shan't talk too much about the food, just to say that you really must try out the black pepper crab, which is delicious! A word of advice, though. It is hard to find parking, so best not to drive there. But they do offer valet services (starts after 7pm, I think) so all is not lost for those who drive.

Our last visit(s) (two of them, a few days from each other) was in early August 2009, when the baby was 4 months old. Back then, he already drew the attention of the waitresses, who kept coming over to play with him. They kept him occupied, allowing us to enjoy our dinner.

Today, when we went, the waitresses (some of them) still remember the baby (the baby is now 8 months old), and played with him, and even carried him around. While we were seated just beside the road, the baby ended up at the counter way inside the restaurant, being carried in turns by waitresses and even one of the kitchen hands! Guess the baby is more popular than the dad... the good thing is, he doesn't cry a lot (only when he is hungry or sleepy) and he is quite okay with people. I will be posting recent photos (we visited a goat farm and koi farm yesterday) of him soon (like in a few weeks...) so watch this space!

事事不顺心

事事不顺心，
出手不如意，
气急心不定，
不能成大业。

Top PSLE student 2009 is Chinese national who had problems with English

This year's top PSLE student is Qiu Biqing, a Chinese national who had problems with English when she first came to Singapore. But she worked hard and scored well for PSLE. So those who have problems learning Chinese should quit complaining and look at this little girl, who showed that with hard work, it is not impossible to learn another language. And she even mentioned that she got better in English because one of her teachers was an ethnic Indian and didn't understand Mandarin, forcing her to use English to communicate with him. Things might have turned out differently if her teachers had tried using Chinese to teach her English (not that our English teachers would have been able to use Chinese to teach her English...)

It is hard work, not the easy way out, that allows one to become better at something.

Thirteen Days (film)

This movie, Thirteen Days, is about the Cuban missile crisis of 1962. It is about how the Kennedy administration struggled internally to come to a solution on how to handle the Soviet's deployment of medium range ballistic missiles (MRBM) and intermediate range ballistic missiles (IRBM) in Cuba, capable of delivering nuclear warheads to the United States.

The movie shows the importance of close civilian control when managing a crisis, to prevent it from escalating further. Left to its own, militaries are trained to fight, to win wars, and are more than ready to go to war. It shows that while rules of engagement are meant to protect the soldiers on the ground executing the orders, they can also lead to escalation if not handled properly and run contrary to the higher political agenda. Thus, while orders are given and rules of engagement are set, and chains of command exist, there are times when direct control by the top over the ground units (bypassing the chain of command in between) is necessary to ensure that things do not get out of hand.

Of course, while close civilian control is needed when managing a crisis, when war breaks out, let the military do what they are trained to do. After all, that's why we spend so much money on them during peacetime training them up.

Charlie Wilson's War (film)

This movie, Charlie Wilson's War, is about a real person, US Congressman Charlie Wilson and his efforts in getting funding to support the Afghan mujahideen in fighting against Soviet aggressors. It is about a small group of determined people, setting the ground for change affecting the whole world. It is actually based on a book by George Crile.

The Congressman, Charlie Wilson, leads a life quite unlike what you expect of a politician. Instead of avoiding vices in public life, he embraces them. He is portrayed as a man who loves women, employing only pretty women in his office, stating that "You can teach a girl to type, but you can't teach a girl to grow tits."

Yet behind all that is actually a man who cared enough to try to make a difference. Once he believed in the cause (of freeing Afghanistan from the Soviets), he actually set down to securing the funding needed for the Afghan mujahideen to get modern weapons so that they stand a fighting chance against the Soviet arsenal. It eventually resulted in the Soviet Army being driven out of Afghanistan, showing the rest of the world that the Soviet Army is not invincible and eventually leading to the crumbling of the Soviet Union.

Particularly important is that towards the end of the show, he tried to get the US government to see the need to rebuild Afghanistan, rather than simply washing their hands off the matter now that the Soviets have left. He cautioned against simply making the changes and then leaving, and advocated the need to make the change and stay behind to rebuild things. While there is little glory and little short term gains to get from rebuilding, the effects are longer term, something which short-sighted (short-lived?) governments are probably not concerned about. I guess this is true of most governments, and policy makers should ask themselves if they are just effecting change for the sake of change, or whether they are willing to follow through with the changes.

Fedora 12 installed!

I finally managed to finish installing Fedora 12 on my old laptop, with all the additional packages that I wanted. Took quite some time to download the packages from the Internet (because my old laptop's DVD drive is sort of old and cannot read the installation DVD or CDs well) but managed to get through it all.

The next challenge is to install Fedora 12 on my desktop, currently running Windows Vista. I am thinking of setting up a dual boot system (Vista and Fedora 12), but the current harddisk has only 60GB of free space left. I am wondering whether I should get a new harddisk and install Fedora 12 on the new harddisk (problem is whether Fedora can boot with the boot loader on one harddisk, while the rest of the files reside on another harddisk), or to install it now on the current harddisk (and subsequently get a new harddisk for data).

Whatever it is, I need to do some housekeeping for the desktop (archive files onto DVD/CD) so that's what going to be keeping me busy. Meanwhile, I am open to suggestions and advice on the two options above.

Bowing to the Japanese Emperor

Article: It's a gesture of respect

You can read the article at The Straits Times, but if you are not a subscriber, you probably won't be able to access the article after 7 days from its publication.

I don't see what is the big fuss about bowing to the Japanese Emperor. I agree that it is a sign of respect. And it shows how well President Obama understands Japanese culture. In Japan, when you bow to the Emperor, you use the 90-degree bow. And the Emperor, by stretching his hand out, shows that he wasn't expecting Obama to bow, but rather to do what is common in American culture, a handshake.

Bowing is not a sign of subservience, it is a sign of respect for people above you. "Above you" need not necessarily be in terms of authority, but can be wisdom, knowledge, age, experience, etc. Rather than make a big fuss about the President of the United States bowing to the Japanese Emperor, we should be talking about how culturally aware the President is.

And as to why the Emperor didn't return the bow (as is usually the case when bowing is used as a greeting)? He isn't expected to, and probably has never bowed to anyone since he took over as Emperor.

Installing Fedora 12

I have been trying to install Fedora 12 since it was released.

First, I tried downloading the DVD. Got it from a mirror site in Japan, burnt it into a DVD, and then when I tried to install, while testing the media, it came back that the DVD has an error. I ran a checksum test on the downloaded ISO image file only to realise that it has errors. So back to downloading again.

This time, I used a mirror site in the US, and tested the checksum before burning the DVD. Yup, checked correct. But the media testing still came back negative when I tried to install using the DVD. I suspected there is a problem with the DVD drive on my old laptop (about 5 yrs old) and so I ended up downloading the CDs instead. Downloaded all 5 image files, tested them correct, and they all passed the media testing.

But halfway through the installation process, when I was told to change from Disc 1 to Disc 2, the DVD drive won't open. So I couldn't change discs. Argh! All that time wasted downloading so many image files and burning them and testing them.

I downloaded the LiveCD version, booted up my old laptop with that, and managed to finally install Fedora 12 using the LiveCD. Only problem is, the LiveCD is barebone minimum, so I still have to install most of the packages subsequently. I first tried using PackageKit, but that kept giving me errors. Finally resolved that by first updating the installation with yum ("yum -y update") before running PackageKit again. Right now, PackageKit is still running, trying to download all the required packages over the Internet, but it seems to be so-far-so-good, so wish me luck! I think it should be able to get everything done.

The moral of the story? While Fedora may run on old computers... your old computer may not be in the best of form (old harddisk about to crash, old DVD drive working intermittently, etc.) so don't blame the software, it could be your hardware that has the problems. Fedora has saved me before when Vista crashed on me in the past (read about it here) and at the end of the day, yes, the problem was with the hardware.

Using English to teach Chinese

Article: English to teach Chinese

You can read the article online at The Straits Times (I think it is available for non-subscribers for 7 days from publication, after which you need to be a subscriber to read it.)

My thoughts on this?

I remember how I first started learning Japanese. The teacher taught in English. Because when you know nothing about a language, there is a need to start from a common starting point. But once I picked up enough basic vocabulary and grammar, the teacher started teaching fully in Japanese, using English only when I still couldn't understand the simple explanations given in Japanese.

I guess it should be the same for all languages (including Chinese). When you first start learning the language, there is no harm using a common language to help teach that new language. But once you have a basic grasp of the new language, teaching should be done in that new language, because as with all things, practice makes perfect. Any opportunity to use that new language (listening, speaking, writing, reading) only serves to improve your skill in it. If you keep giving people the easy way out (allowing them to revert to English, for example), they lose the opportunity to improve, they don't see the need to improve (since they can always switch back to English). Without practice and without necessity, how are they going to improve?

Learning languages

Recently, there has been quite a few newspaper articles on learning Chinese in Singapore schools, and how to improve the teaching methods to make Chinese lessons interesting.

I remember my Chinese lessons in the past. Boring. Because most of it was trying to get us to memorise words, phrases, and write compositions, fill in the blanks, etc. But I can say the same thing about English lessons. Same old boring stuff as well.

What got me interested in Chinese was my Chinese tuition teacher (my Chinese grades were so bad, my parents got worried and hired a tuition teacher for me). He didn't believe in going through the textbooks ("Your teacher will do that in school") or going through tons of assessment books ("There is already enough homework for practice"). What he did was find out what I was interested in, and how to get me interested in Chinese.

It started with using the language. Speaking Mandarin outside of class was not something that I often did (I usually spoke English at home), so the practice did help. Then he found out that I was playing Romance of the Three Kingdoms 2 and used that to introduce me to the story itself. I remember discussing the characters with him (I had read the English translation of the story) and he gave me a copy of a Mandarin recitation of the story. I got so interested in the story that I got myself the book in Chinese, and we eventually went on to discuss the poems inside.

Chinese poems. That was another means used to get me interested in Chinese. He would introduce poems to me, and I would learn what they meant. Discussing the poems would bring about discussions of the historical settings, and from there, I learnt Chinese history. As I learnt more and more about Chinese history, I delved deeper into the Chinese culture and traditions, and since then, my passion for Chinese has never died.

My grades got better. In fact, they became good. Class was a breeze, and eventually I even wrote my own simple poems in Chinese (you can find some of them here with the rest of my works).

I think the most important thing about learning a language is interest. Next is necessity. Interest allowed me to pick up Chinese even though I was getting by well on English. Necessity made me pick up Japanese.

Studying in Japan in an environment fully immersed in the Japanese culture (where no one is even going to bother speaking English to you) forced me to pick up Japanese. Classes were conducted in Japanese, and no one knows enough English to be able to explain anything to you in English, so either I pick up Japanese to understand what the lecturers were saying, or I flunk my classes. That sure did help to motivate me to pick up the language. Having to use it every waking hour (greeting people, asking classmates about homework, asking people for directions, etc.) really did help a lot too. Writing reports, listening to the news, watching TV, all these helped. At the end of the day, this total immersion in the Japanese culture allowed me to pick up the language even though I had only 2 months of formal Japanese lessons.

I guess if we are really serious about getting our kids to learn more than one language, then we need to work on their interest, since they will eventually pick up whatever is necessary when they are immersed in the situation. With our tech savvy kids, if you allow them to play War of Warcraft during class, but only using Chinese, I am sure they will improve in Chinese. Rather than find ways to make lessons (Chinese or English) interesting, I think it is more important to find out what the kids are interested in, and weave in these languages, and once they are hooked, get them to start seeing the beauty in the language (that's when poetry and literature usually comes in).

Parenting boot camp - Day 5

Day 5, the last day of boot camp (weekends don't count, since I help to take care of the baby on weekends anyway, so it is not out of the norm). I survived yet another day.

The baby loves to take a poo whenever he is having his meals. Guess with his little body, for something to go in, something needs to come out. With him eating solid food now, his poo smells different too (it is much more smelly now...)

He is a very good boy, though. If he wakes up and the rest of us are still sleeping, he doesn't cry to get our attention. Instead, he hangs around in bed, looking at his sleeping parents, or sometimes wanders off the bed and crawls around the bedroom while waiting for us to wake up.

It has been a very tiring 5 days, much more tiring compared to working, since I am not used to the rhythm that the baby follows. I am really appreciative of what my wife has been going through (and will continue to go through) taking care of the baby, seeing to his needs, working her schedule around his.

Just hope no permanent damage was done to the back from all the carrying... if I grow old with backache, at least I know who to look for to claim medical fees...

Parenting boot camp - Day 4

Day 4, and I survived yet another day.

The back is starting to feel the stress... it really is not joke carrying 12kg for stretches at a time. I strained my right wrist a while back (carrying the baby...) and now, both wrists are feeling the strain... I guess it probably will heal only after the baby starts walking.

The baby only goes to sleep when he is fed the bottle (if he is hungry) or by someone carrying him and rocking him to sleep (if he is not hungry). Most of the time, he is not hungry when he is sleepy... that explains all the carrying. I just hope I don't do any permanent damage to my back. My wife probably had it better, since she was taking care of the baby all the while, and her "physical conditioning" was a gradual buildup, rather than the "start with 12kg" for me.

He still cries in the middle of the night (at least that's what my wife says). I am oblivious to the cries... evolution has helped me to filter that sound out of my hearing system...

Fedora 12

Fedora 12 is out. Get it here.

There is a LiveCD version of it as well, with the GNOME desktop. Suitable for those who just want to give it a try. And if you like it, you can install using the CD as well.

Of course, if you are already using Fedora, you can always upgrade your current installation, or do a fresh installation.

I am now in the midst of downloading it, to upgrade my installation on my old laptop (if possible, otherwise, I may have to do a fresh installation).

Parenting boot camp - Day 3

Day 3. I survived yet another day. But I was very tired today, don't know why. Maybe carrying the 12kg baby all the time is starting to take its toll on me. I tried to do some basic taiji exercises today. Usually, my thigh muscles will start to feel tired... today, even before my thigh muscles tire, I could feel the muscles on my lower back and around my bum burning... muscle ache from too much carrying?

The baby is still awake... wonder why he doesn't want to sleep tonight...

Meteor shower

Flashes of light,
Streaks both bright and slight,
Tails of white,
Trailing behind in flight.

(This was written on 18 Nov 1998, when I stayed up to see the Leonids meteor shower. A wonderful sight. Try it some time.)

Leonids

The Leonids is a meteor shower that peaks around 17 Nov each year. If you have never stayed up to watch a meteor shower, I would suggest that you try it at least once, and the Leonids is probably the best bet. Just find a clear spot away from city lights. A clear sky is a must, of course. The best place is out in the open sea (clear sky, no city lights) but not everyone has the luxury of being on a cruise on 17 Nov each year.

The first time I did this was 11 years ago. The last time I did this was 10 years ago. After that, I never gotten down to staying up late at night to watch shooting stars. But maybe if I move to a place far from the city, I will have a chance to watch these spectacular shows of nature again.

Parenting boot camp - Day 2

Day 2. I survived. Yet another day. And it wasn't as bad, since I have gotten my footing, though I am still a long way off. Getting better at seeing to the baby's needs, but he still prefers his mother (of course) though I can manage to calm him better now.

He is a テレビっ子 (terebikko, someone who loves watching TV). Loves sitting in front of the TV, even though I am quite sure he doesn't understand anything that is going on, or what is being said (the shows here are in English and some in Mandarin, which he doesn't understand since the language being spoken at home is Japanese). But still, the TV draws his attention (for some time) so it helps to keep him occupied and quiet and happy. Which makes me happy too.

Wish me luck for the rest of the week ahead!

Top Gun (film)

The classic of all fighter pilot movies, Top Gun. The story is simple, short, and the movie is all about the aerial combat, which is what fighter pilot movies should all be about. After all, that's what fighter pilots do.

If you are looking for story, don't bother. Not in this movie.

What you will find in this movie is lots of aircraft, lots of flying, lots of action, designed to show the thrill of flying, the speed at which things take place up in the air. It may not be realistic (fighter aircraft don't fly so close to each other nowadays, not with the progress of missile technology) but realism doesn't always sell (unless you are talking about documentaries). It's a great movie to kill time, to see a young Tom Cruise, to see male bonding, to see competition between the best of the best, to see aircraft and aircraft up close.

Great soundtracks too. Danger Zone, Take My Breath Away, Mighty Wings, and of course, the Top Gun Anthem.









It's a movie that you just want to watch again and again, even though there isn't anything to it.

Parenting boot camp - Day 1

I am on leave over the next few days to help take care of the baby.

It is like going through boot camp. At least, that was how Day 1 felt like.

I am now 100% (200% may be a better figure) appreciative of what my wife does to take care of the baby. Before today, I never had to take care of the baby's every needs. My wife was always there, I was just helping her.

Today (and for the rest of the week), it was (and will be) a reversal of roles. I am now the one in charge of taking care of the baby, while she helps out occasionally.

My back is still hurting from carrying the baby (he is huge, weighing 12kg even though he is less than 8 months old). I still can't discern his reason for crying (Hungry? Lonely? Sleepy? Diaper?) and my wife says I probably end up carrying him more than he needed to be. I had a hard time trying to get him to sleep because I don't know what he likes. I know he goes to sleep when you carry him, but learnt that the other alternative is to feed him the bottle. I still take half an hour to feed him his porridge (my wife usually takes half that time). Bathing him was the easy part since it is something that I have been doing. Keeping him company for hours at a time, however, is something really new (never had to do that before, since by the time I come back from work, it is dinner, bath, sleep). I didn't have time to do my own stuff since I had to keep an eye on him, play with him, make sure he doesn't tear the house down or play with the sockets, keep him from licking things like slippers, and the list just goes on.

I wonder how my wife does all these things, but I guess that is the wonder of mothers. She does all these, plus the housework, and still sneaks in time in between to update her blog, surf the net, watch TV, does sewing, and even go shopping and meet up with friends. Me? I am dead beat just trying to see to the baby's needs.

Day 1 is over, I hope I can survive the week...

Singapore blogs

I didn't know there was a blog to bind all blogs... or rather, a blog listing all Singaporean blogs, or at least try to do so.

Until I happened upon it while searching for the article by Sumiko Tan.

Well, here it is, sgblogs.com, which is a blog that searches the Internet trying to find blogs related to Singapore.

Modern dads

Yet another article by Sumiko Tan. This one is called "Charm of a modern dad". You can read the article here (if you are an online subscriber to The Straits Times) or here.

I am what she terms a modern dad. I like to go out with my son. I enjoy pushing his stroller around the shopping mall, while my wife goes off shopping (and enjoying whatever little time she has away from the baby). I don't mind searching around for a nursing room to change his diapers (and finding out that some malls have the nursing room inside the ladies), feeding him milk when he is hungry, or carrying him when he gets bored sitting in the stroller. I enjoy carrying him around for a walk (although it can be tiring, with him being heavy for his age). I guess it is because I don't spend a lot of time with him, which is why I all the more treasure the little time that I have with him (even if it is just helping to change his diapers or feeding him milk).

And sometimes, when I am alone with the baby, people look at me with curious eyes that seems to be asking, "Where's the mother?" And seems like I am not alone, with a similar article in yesterday's papers as well. Somehow, there is the stereotype that mothers, not fathers, are supposed to be the ones carrying babies around and attending to their needs. While I don't take care of the baby as much as my wife does, I do enjoy spending time with him, no matter what form that takes.

无谓忙碌

千忙百累无闲暇，
日夜奔波到头空，
无谓忙碌不是我，
不如漫步诗人梦。

温柔的夜 by 邓妙华

我的心是幽幽的湖水
温柔的月色是你的倒影
你把自己浸在夜里
微湿的长发牵动我的相思

我的心是轻轻的涟漪
开展的波纹是我的情绪
若能让你笑着不怕
你眼睛将是我梦里最美的星

多希望用我小小的一生
轻轻为你点亮一盏灯
让我看清你 让我看清你
怕过了明天已不是做梦的年龄

多希望用我全部的生命
低低为你轻唱着爱情
让你感觉我 让你感觉我
思念的湖水里浮动你的倒影
让我看清你 让我看清你
怕过了明天已不是做梦的年龄

This used to be an ending theme for a TV serial, and I managed to find it on Youtube.

Still too early, but...

Winds blow,
Footsteps slow,
Rivers flow,
Boats tow,
I know,
It will snow.

(Written 11 years ago, on 4 Nov 1998, when it was still too early to snow...)

Calligraphy piece - 精湛 exhibition piece

This is the actual piece displayed during the exhibition, after all the work thinking up of the phrase, practising for it, and finally preparing it.

Besides the main exhibition at Tokyo, my teacher will also be helping me to enter this in the local exhibition in Yokosuka.

Calligraphy exhibition

The exhibition by 温知会 took place from 30 Oct to 3 Nov. It is an event that happens once every two years in late Oct or early Nov. Below are the pieces displayed at the exhibition, written by my calligraphy teacher.

The first is a set of 76 Chinese characters written by my teacher.

Next is a set of kana written by her.

I will be posting my piece in a separate post.

The Secret History of the World

I recently finished reading this book. It is about how things can be explored in a different way. Instead of the way of science that we are so used to, it asks us to consider exploring the world as how our ancestors would see it, in a more spiritual way. It also touches on the development of secret societies and how these societies seek to preserve the spiritual thinking of the past, and how such thinking actually helped to evolve mankind, and will continue to evolve mankind.

The book tries to draw a parallel between creation of the world as outlined by Genesis (and some Greek mythology), and creation of the world as proposed by science (Big Bang and evolution). I thought it was quite interesting to see how such parallels could be drawn, to see how passages in the Bible could be interpreted in a more conceptual sense rather than taken at face value (word for word meaning).

I think the more interesting idea to explore will be to look into the creation myths of other cultures (such as the Egyptians, the Indians, the Chinese) to see how the theories proposed by science can have parallels to these other creation myths. After all, if what the book proposes is true, the spiritual way of thinking is handed down in various cultures and thus their creation myths must in some way contain similar parallels.

Secret (2007 film by Jay Chou)

Okay, I am not a Jay Chou fan. In fact, I don't really know any songs by him.

I watched this movie because I had nothing better to do. And of course, the girl's (she is actually 桂纶镁 Kwai Lun Mei) face on the DVD cover looked pretty. I found the DVD lying around in office, and decided to take a look. It did help to kill some time.

What I liked about the movie is the simple yet romantic plot. The endearing process of two people meeting and falling in love. And then it seems that they cannot be together. But by some effort, they managed to be together again. Sounds amazing like the Return of the Condor Heroes. But hey, like I said, I am a sucker for love stories.

As said, I like the plot. Impossible yet romantic. And maybe it is because the plot is impossible, that makes it all the more romantic. Recommended for those who like love stories, and impossible romantics.

The moon

We share the same bright white lamp,
No matter where on the earth we tramp.
White light bringing a gentle glow,
Even as the cold winds blow.
The changing intensity of the light,
From bright to dark, dark to bright.
Changing slowly with each day,
As I look up from the bay.
Far apart but close at heart,
It is a pity we must part.
Yet know that here the moon is full,
How I wish you were here too.
To share with you this bright full moon,
And my life, be it midnight or noon.
How I wish you were here with me,
Instead of the miles between us that be.
Watching the moon while holding your hands,
It beats sharing the moon in different lands.

Happy Halloween

I guess Halloween is not something usually celebrated in Singapore, but it has recently caught on (I guess it has to do with the exposure to Western culture) so here's wishing everyone a happy Halloween!

On Facebook

I am finally on Facebook.

After resisting it for so long...

Why the change of heart? I realised that quite a few of my colleagues were on Facebook, quite some friends as well. One of the reasons I didn't join Facebook was because my sister wasn't on Facebook, and she told me that I can't be more tech savvy than her. But with everyone else on Facebook, I guess it is only a matter of time before the wave caught me.

You can find me here.

我是真的真的愿意 by 小松小柏

我是真的真的愿意

如果云彩上有不雕零的花，我愿攀上天梯采下，放在你脚旁
伴随着你，用心期待，等你弯腰亲吻着它
如果山顶上有不褪色的虹，我愿谱上绚丽音符，藏在我心中
默默为你，附上新诗，直到你能为它歌唱
我是真的真的愿意，生生和世世只因为爱你
你是否愿意为我守候，让未来的路以永恒为期盼

如果山顶上有不褪色的虹，我愿谱上绚丽音符，藏在我心中
默默为你，附上新诗，直到你能为它歌唱
我是真的真的愿意，生生和世世只因为爱你
你是否愿意为我守候，让未来的路以永恒为期盼

我是真的真的愿意，生生和世世只因为爱你
你是否愿意为我守候，让未来的路以永恒为期盼

(I can't find this on Youtube, so just the lyrics. Recommended by a friend of mine.)

Another collision

Just when you thought things have quieten down for the JMSDF, they decided to get themselves into the news again.

Japanese destroyer tried to stop before collision: defense chief

Not a good thing, too many collisions in too short a timespan.

In collisions at sea, the naval vessel usually comes out the loser. Because you would think that a warship, tasked with shooting the enemy, would have better sense that to get itself into navigational problems. It is hard to shoot the enemy if you can't even navigate safely.

"The mark of a great shiphandler is never getting into situations that require great shiphandling." - Ernest J. King

Other sea service quotes can be found here.

Carrying a notebook

To most of your, carrying a notebook around probably makes you think about carrying a portable computer around. After all, unlike the good old days, when portable computers cost a bomb and weighed like one, the netbooks available nowadays are small and cheap as well.

But no, I am not talking about computers here, I am talking about the paper kind of notebooks.

I used to carry a notebook wherever I went. I would jot down thought, phrases that came to mind. I would then use these to expand on for prose and short writings. The recent spate of works were results of my notebooks.

But I haven't been doing that for a while.

Then an established writer, You Jin, mentioned in a recent newspaper article that she always carries her notebooks with her wherever she goes. It reminded me of my past practice, and I have once again decided to stick with it.

A notebook allows you to capture your thoughts before your forget them. They serve as ideas or references for future expansion, even if eventually you choose not to work on them. The ideas noted down can be built on, expanded, combined with other thoughts/ideas. Or left alone. But if you don't capture them down in a notebook when you can, you will end up losing them. Because too many things race through our minds each day, it is just impossible for us to remember each and every thought/idea.

Calligraphy piece - 精湛 exhibition prep

While in Japan, I spent some time working on my calligraphy piece, which is going to be part of an exhibition organised by 温知会 from 30 Oct to 3 Nov. The final products are below.
One of them will used for the exhibition, depending on my teacher's decision. A vast improvement from the drafts so far.

At Le Soleil

We visited a place called Le Soleil while in Japan. It was a farm theme park, where children get to see flowers, farm animals, even ride on ponies and milk goats. But, it happened to be raining on the day we went, and all the animals went indoors and there wasn't much we could do.

The baby, though, managed to see some goats, and even got a chance to feel a guinea pig. Guess it wasn't a totally wasted trip after all.

Time for change... not

In a previous post about the recent change in the ruling party of Japan, I mentioned that it is unlikely that there will be many significant changes.

The new ruling party promised to end the refueling mission of the JMSDF in the Indian Ocean. And it seemed that, contrary to my belief, they were really going to make good that promise.

Until today.

Kitazawa considers refueling support for antipiracy mission off Somalia

Guess they have decided to end the refueling mission in the Indian Ocean in support of the US's war on terror, only to continue it somewhere else (off Somalia) for a different purpose (war against piracy). But they are still going to deploy the JMSDF overseas in support of an international operation.

I wonder how long it will be before the Japanese people get tired of this playing with words.

I know not what is in store

I know not what is in store,
I think back at what was before.
Hating myself, yet without means,
Helpless I am, endless spins.
Only in my dreams I see you,
How I wish sunrise is never due.

(Written on 7 Dec 1998.)

My Sister's Keeper (film)

I caught this movie on the plane. What struck me was the plot. Biologically engineering a child so that parts of her can be donated to help her sister. She was not conceived by accident. Nor was she artificially conceived by childless parents wanting a child. She was artificially conceived to fulfill a purpose in life, that of prolonging the life of her sister.

Anna was raised to help Kate.

To Anna, what was her meaning in life? Her parents have made her meaning in life to be helping Kate.

When Kate dies, what happens to Anna? That is something the movie does not explore. Now that Anna has lost her original meaning for being, how is she is find a new meaning to her life?

(The book has a different ending, with Anna dying and Kate living. Guess that resolves the issue of having to explore what happens to Anna if Kate dies.)

温知会

The calligraphy society that I belong to is known as 温知会 (On-chi-kai). It comes from the Chinese idiom, 温故知新, which means to revise what you already know in order to learn something new.

I think this concept is really important. We need to constantly reviewed what we know, because as we grow in knowledge and experience, we may gain new understanding. We will look at things in different ways and thus even the same event that happened before, will mean something different to us now. This applies not just to calligraphy or taiji, but to all learning processes.

The moment we stop reviewing our past knowledge, we have shut off an invaluable teacher, ourselves.

Making decisions

We all have to make decisions. Some big, some small. We have to decide whether to get out of bed or sleep another 5 minutes. We have to decide whether to wait another minute or dash across the street. We have to decide if we take a risk and invest in a small Internet startup or put our money on established blue chip firms. We have to decide if someone is the one we want to spend the rest of our lives with.

We all will hesitate once in a while, but at the end of the day, things only move when someone makes a decision, even if the decision is a decision not to do anything. It is indecision that we should fear. If we do not decide, we may end up late for work. If we do not decide, then we may miss the bus. If we do not decide, we may miss the chance to make a killing on the stock market. If we do not decide, we may end up losing our partner for life. There are no right or wrong decisions, only good or bad ones.

So decide. Make a choice. Even if the choice is not to choose. Then live by your decisions. Because you made them, and they were the best decisions you could have made at any given time, with your given knowledge and experience.

Be content?

There are people who say that we should never grow contented with what we have. I think being contented with what we have is very important to being happy. Rather than saying that we should never grow contented, we should do our best and then be contented with what we reap. Things can always be better if you put in more effort, but that is when you need to strike a balance. What is it that you want, what is it that your treasure?

I want to live in a world of peace

I want to live,
In a world of peace,
One where people see,
Not just you and me,
But what is inside,
This material shell of mine,
A world where people care,
Not for just you and me,
But for the world itself,
For that cat by the street,
The dog half-dead,
A grizzly wandering,
That gorilla without a home,
For that tree decaying,
That forest being cut.
A world where you and I,
Can live on and pass on,
To sons and daughters,
For future humankind.

I will always be there

Don't worry, I will always be there,
Beside you, anytime, anywhere.
When things look rough,
When times are tough,
Look beside you and you will find,
That I am there, just behind.
Ready to help you whenever I can,
To give you support in all your attempts.
Always there, never far away,
For, away from you I do not stray.
I will stand by you in all that you do,
Lending my hand whenever you need.
So when you need that extra hand,
Do not forget you have this friend.

Shooting star

So swift, so fast,
Not more than a moment did you last,
Little more than a small dot of light,
Yet in the dark you seemed so bright.
Flashing across the sky,
The brightness died even as you fly,
Little more than a single streak,
Yet a sight seeming all too quick.

Men of the sea

Different nations we serve,
Different flags we fly,
Different allegiances we have,
Different doctrines we apply.
Yet we all share a common point,
We all share a common element.
We all share a common friend,
Who is also our common foe.
The unpredictable sea,
Our beloved sea,
On her we live our lives,
To her we lose our lives.
War we may be at,
Enemies we may be,
Yet before we can fight each other,
We must first fight the sea.
Brothers we all are,
We men of the sea,
For in the fight against her,
Differences mean nothing.

(Sons of the sea share a common challenge, that of facing the tempers of the sea. That is what bonds us together although we all have our differences.)

From my notebook

A collection of short works from my notebook, written between Aug and Oct 1998.

Weary soul,
Troubled heart,
Walking with footsteps so slow,
Closing the distance worlds apart.
Distance so far,
Time so little,
Nothing can bear,
Thoughts so bitter.
(Written on 26 Aug 1998)
------------------------------
The rustling of leaves,
A random sound.
The high flying hawks,
Circling around.
(Written on 29 Sep 1998)
------------------------------
Cold winds chill hearts,
Heavy rains drench souls,
Earthquakes shake spirits,
Lightning scorch bodies.
(Written on 29 Sep 1998)
------------------------------
One, two, three, four,
And as I slowly look around,
More and more appear,
I am filled, astound.
The myriad of lights,
Each one so far away,
Wonderful sights,
Set this night into play.
(Written on 18 Oct 1998)

Lost in a desert

Everywhere I look it is the same,
The same colour, the same sand.
Flat plains, rolling dunes,
This is what they call desert land.
Fine grains make the ground so soft,
It is hard to trudge, feet just don't budge.
Though not wet, it is sticky like a swamp,
But so dry, I wished it was damp.
The horrid sun poured down its heat,
Baking the sand, and all upon it.
Sweat dripped down like a waterfall,
My throat, parched like a furnace wall.
The wind was not a help either,
Carrying sand across the land,
Eroding away all in its path,
Hitting me like little pellets.
Not a person in my sight,
Moisture I seek with all my might.
Could it be that the end is near,
An unmarked grave in a sandy land?

On stars

One looks up at night, to see the little dots,
Scattered all over, decorating the darkness.
One by one, at twilight they slowly appear,
Till the night sky is filled with their brightness.
Seemingly random, to some they may be,
Yet to our ancestors, pictures they be.
A hunter, a bear, a crane and cross,
All these they are, and many more.
Life is out there, somewhere in the stars,
Lying in wait, waiting for us to explore.
Once in a while, one will fly by,
Leaving behind, a path of light.
As quickly as it appears, it disappears,
In the blink of an eye, a turn of the head.
Stars guided our forefathers across the seas,
They helped our physicists with new theories.
Lovers sit together, admiring their greatness,
I lift my head, and wonder at their vastness.

中等美女 by 刚泽斌

《中等美女》
(词: 刚泽斌 曲: 刚泽斌 编曲: 黄韵玲)

这话不知该从何讲起 想起你仍多甜蜜
相遇绝对有其意义 不然嘴角怎会有笑意扬起
有天夜里我一直了无睡意 偷偷爬起只怕惊醒你
轻轻将你的手拉开我的身边 只是怕打搅你做梦的情绪

中等美女 我最常叫你的一句 事隔多年 但是却经常想起
中等美女 我最常叫你的一句 事隔多年 但是却经常想起

这话不知该从何讲起 走了一圈仍是你
你躺在我的胸口 均匀地呼吸 感动直达心最底
很想把你轻轻的拥在怀里 却不敢移动自己的身体
怕把自己的梦打破惊醒 我仍和那批难兄难弟扬长离去

中等美女 我最常叫你的一句 事隔多年 但是却经常想起
中等美女 我最常叫你的一句 事隔多年 但是却经常想起

中等美女 我最常叫你的一句 事隔多年 但是却经常想起
中等美女 我最常叫你的一句 事隔多年 但是却经常想起
中等美女 我最常叫你的一句 事隔多年 但是却经常想起
中等美女 我最常叫你的一句 事隔多年 但是却经常想起
这话不知该从何讲起 想起你仍多甜蜜
这话不知该从何讲起 走了一圈仍是你

(Sometimes, it is the average that is most beautiful. Anyway, I couldn't find this on Youtube, so I guess the lyrics will have to do.)

Starry starry night

Starry starry night,
Twinkling jewels of shimmering light,
In the darkness stars so bright,
Come together a wondrous sight.
Beautiful starlight,
Filled my eyes both left and right,
All my dreams I hold on tight,
For them I gladly fight.
Wonderful delight,
Numerous poems I recite,
In the tower at this height,
I stare with all my might.
Blooming sunlight,
Slowly chasing away the night,
Devouring the stars with each small bite,
Until it is bright daylight.

Written about 10 years ago, inspired by the song starting with the same words.

Vincent (Starry starry night) by Don McLean

A song that I like.



Starry, starry night.
Paint your palette blue and grey,
Look out on a summer's day,
With eyes that know the darkness in my soul.
Shadows on the hills,
Sketch the trees and the daffodils,
Catch the breeze and the winter chills,
In colors on the snowy linen land.

Now I understand what you tried to say to me,
How you suffered for your sanity,
How you tried to set them free.
They would not listen, they did not know how.
Perhaps they'll listen now.

Starry, starry night.
Flaming flowers that brightly blaze,
Swirling clouds in violet haze,
Reflect in Vincent's eyes of china blue.
Colors changing hue, morning field of amber grain,
Weathered faces lined in pain,
Are soothed beneath the artist's loving hand.

Now I understand what you tried to say to me,
How you suffered for your sanity,
How you tried to set them free.
They would not listen, they did not know how.
Perhaps they'll listen now.

For they could not love you,
But still your love was true.
And when no hope was left in sight
On that starry, starry night,
You took your life, as lovers often do.
But I could have told you, Vincent,
This world was never meant for one
As beautiful as you.

Starry, starry night.
Portraits hung in empty halls,
Frameless head on nameless walls,
With eyes that watch the world and can't forget.
Like the strangers that you've met,
The ragged men in the ragged clothes,
The silver thorn of bloody rose,
Lie crushed and broken on the virgin snow.

Now I think I know what you tried to say to me,
How you suffered for your sanity,
How you tried to set them free.
They would not listen, they're not listening still.
Perhaps they never will...

Below is the version by Qi Yu 齊豫, which is the one I prefer.

The road lies ahead

The road lies ahead,
Forked and twisted,
Undulating and unpaved,
Seeming so wasted.

Yet a step I took,
And then another,
Slowly I walked,
Nevermind the bother.
Difficult it is,
Yet challenges nourish,
Heart, mind and soul,
Eventually will flourish.

In time I shall look back,
And see for myself,
What I left behind,
Is now my wealth.
Not in terms of cash,
Nor in terms of land,
'Tis in terms of time,
What I could withstand.
Pains I had shouldered,
Storms I had weathered,
Ideals shattered,
Experiences gathered.

How better to grow,
Than to walk this path,
A road that is rough,
A life that is tough.

Probably written in 1999, which is 10 years ago!

On hawks again

Round and round you flew up there,
With a laziness that seems so rare,
Gliding on the breeze with wings spread wide,
I wished you could take me for a ride.
Life up there must be simple and serene,
Nothing to do, except appreciate the scene,
Food not lacking, water aplenty,
Freedom stretching far beyond the city.
With unhurried speed and confident look,
A majestic sight, my breath you took.
"How many circles have you flown?"
"For as long as the wind has blown."

(Birds of prey, like hawks that I used to see so often, never fail to intrigue me. These majestic creatures have a regal air around them, moving with grace yet with a hint of tenacity, and full of confidence.)

On hawks

In a lazy circle above my head, I watched him fly,
The winds carrying him in the light blue sky.
Round and round, an endless flight,
Flying up there, mocking at my plight.
The poor me, trapped to this earth,
Confined to this land, my own turf.
Run as I might, I soon come to a fence,
Cooped up in this place, I feel so tense.
A screech I heard from the hawk above me,
A mocking laugh to me it seemed to be.
"Where can you go, fenced in on all sides?
Up here without fences, it is I who decide."
With envy I stared at the hawk above.
Freedom it possesses, freedom that I love.
But the hawk too, has the problem of freedom,
Where to go, in this vast big kingdom?

(There are many hawks in the surroundings of my campus when I was studying. They can often be found either gliding in the breeze in lazy circles or perched up high on the rooftops of buildings.)

When the student is ready, the teacher will appear

There is a Buddhist proverb that goes, "When the student is ready, the teacher will appear."

My Chinese tremendously improved due to my Chinese tuition teacher. He appeared at a time when I was ready to immerse myself in Chinese.

When I was ready to work on my calligraphy, my calligraphy teacher was there ready to teach.

When I was ready to learn more about taiji, I happened upon my taiji teacher.

I guess life is full of learning. When you are ready to learn, someone will be there ready to teach you.

Firefight

Behind a tree I hid in fright,
A battle within myself first I fight,
Tool in hand, trained to use,
Yet right now, I simply refuse.
Rapidly breathing, heart racing,
I knew I better start thinking,
Start deciding, I better be doing,
Before it becomes my own undoing.
The sounds around me helped not,
The screams as comrades were shot,
The booms as bombs were dropped,
The blasts as grenades were popped.

In that split second I resolved,
The conflict within me, now solved,
All doubts in me now dissolved,
Killing the foe my thoughts now revolved.
Rifle in hand, as it always was,
I peeped out from behind my tree,
Only to see, a man, the enemy,
Aiming straight at my best friend Tim.

Principles, morals, mercy,
They flew out of all my thoughts,
The only thing in my mind was now,
He is going to kill my best friend Tim.

Hesitation did not guide my hand,
As I brought the rifle up to stand,
Training my sights at the man,
My finger squeezed, and the bullet went.
Wham! The bullet hit the man,
My aim was true, the head it slammed,
He stood headless, for a second,
Then collapsed, a headless mess.

Oh my God, what have I done?
My first kill, the very first one.
Thoughts sink in, realisation begins,
At the foul deed, I have done.

But there was no time to reflect or cry,
The firefight goes on, and so must I,
The first one done, what is two or three?
I aimed and fired, and fired and fired.
How many I downed, I did not count,
The screams and cries, I do not recount,
In my mind, I only thought,
They must die, or it is my comrades and I.

I probably wrote this after reading some book on the Vietnam War.